9/29/05

Am I Insane?
Oh god. I have no idea what to do. I am having serious second thoughts about going ahead with Miles' surgery. Someone posted a link to a video about ear prosthetics on my microtia site today. I've heard of this guy before--he's been on lots of tv shows and his work is amazing.

So this just fed into my fears of "are we doing the right thing?" After checking out his site, I sent an email with a few questions and he called me back within the hour. He's a very nice guy, but VERY against reconstructive ear surgery. He said he has made it one of his goals in life to convince people not to do it, because they will regret it. He has a point that reconstructed ears, even when done by the best (in my opinion Dr. R., who is scheduled to do the surgery) never look "perfect." I've seen a little boy in real life, plus pictures of others on the internet, and while Dr. R's ears look far better than any others I've seen, they still look...funky.

We're doing this on the absolute early end of the spectrum--most people do it when their kid is 5 or 6. I'm really thinking that we should wait. What if a new procedure develops in the next few years that is better than what Dr. R is currently using? What if Miles' new ear looks bad? What if he's angry we performed surgery on him?

Part of me just wants to get this over with. Part of me says we should wait and look into prosthetics more seriously and also wait in case a new procedure is developed (like growing ears, a definite possibility for some day, but who knows how long).

How do I make this kind of decision for another person???? I have no doubt that we have to do something by age 6 at the latest. I hear that is when kids really get mean. But now I'm thinking we should wait at least until age 5 to decide what to do.

ARGHHHHHH.......